Stress is a symptom of something else.
It's a sign that we're trying to evade the here-and-now
for the what-might-be or what-once-was.

In a National Public Radio Interview: Eckhart Tolle spoke to Christa Tippett about this.

MR. TOLLE:   What is stress?
Stress is normal in our civilization
but really basically what it means
is you would rather be somewhere else.

Stress means you want to be in the next moment
or you want already to be finished with what you're doing
while you're still doing it.

You would rather be finished with it.
Or while you're traveling towards someplace,
you'd rather already be there.

MS. TIPPETT: OK.

MR. TOLLE: But you're not.
And stress is so normal that everybody accepts
that, OK, if you're successful in life then you must be under stress.

MS. TIPPETT: Right. But I think counterintuitively
you're saying you lean in rather than wishing it away.

MR. TOLLE: Yes. It's by becoming friendly with the present moment.
What's my relationship, is the present moment my friend or my enemy?
Another little pointer. And it's a strange question, but if you look very closely,
you'd find that very often you make the present moment into virtually an enemy.
Or it becomes an obstacle.

MS. TIPPETT: And you're saying that we do have the power.
Whatever is enclosed in that moment,
we have the power not to define it as an obstacle.
And that's going to change the way we approach it.

MR. TOLLE: Yes. The first thing is the realization of what you're doing.
In other words, one could say: "see the madness in yourself".
And that's not a bad thing; it's a great thing,
because that is not something to be depressed about.
That means that you are awakening.
And that which is awakening is the awareness behind the thinking.

We have no choice but to experience each and every moment of life.
We could anesthetize ourselves using various drugs, or drinks, or excess food,
but that's an entirely different topic.

We are here physically regardless of how we feel mentally,
but we can feel better if we try to synch our mind and body…
If we try to be really present
and find small moments of happiness throughout the day.

Down the road, perhaps we will change our lives
and find larger, more permanent ways to inject happiness into it.
But for right now, this moment, we need to try to find small moments of happiness.

Changing one’s mindset from merely existing to really living isn't easy,
but once you do it, it is surprising at how contagious a positive attitude can be.

Courage is a critical resource that we all need.

To clarify an important point:
People often believe that being brave means that you are not afraid,
but the reality is actually the opposite.
Bravery is acting in spite of fear -- not without it.

Taking the next indicated step is the basis for any courageous action.
It’s just about the next step, because the ones after that one,
can be dealt with in their own time.

We all have courage,
but it’s easy for fear to overwhelm our courageous actions.
By focusing on our own personal goals,
and advancing one step at a time,
we can move on to greater levels in life,
and face challenges we might once have thought impossible.

Everyone makes mistakes,
hits a bump in the road,
has setbacks, or problems.

 What sets people apart
is how they react to the bump.

Some people spin out of control, in despair.
Others grab the wheel and steer themselves straight.

Whether it’s a vacation or a family crisis,
we all encounter things that slow us down.
It’s important to keep in mind that a setback
is only temporary and greater things lay ahead.

It is easy just to quit,.
but I believe in the "two steps forward, one step back" philosophy.
So what if something bad happens?
I work to keep moving forward, developing what I have.
I’ve already built a solid foundation on which to rely.
Hard work can’t be overlooked.

 When something doesn’t turn out as we’ve expected,
it is important to be objective.
Step back and look at the situation.
Take responsibility where it is due,
but don’t place blame on others.

Is the setback really that significant,
or will it just require a little extra exertion?
Come to terms with it and then start planning your next move.

It’s okay to ask for help.
Don’t be afraid or ashamed to do this.
Most times, people are willing to give you support and advice,
maybe even after being in a similar situation.
None of us is perfect.
 Bounce back.
Reevaluate the goals you’ve set for yourself
and rework them as necessary.
Goals should be realistic and specific, but also flexible.

View things as a success, instead of a failure.
Instead of focusing on the mistake,
take a moment to sit back
and think about the things that have been accomplished.

Let’s not focus on regret.
Success is never easy.
It remains up to each of us, whether we will give up,
or fight through the tough battles to earn what we want.

There’s a poem by Ralph Waldo Emerson that goes:

"Finish each day
And be done with it.
You have done what you could.
Some blunders and
Absurdities have crept in.
Forget them as soon as you can."

Originally posted by member in a weight-loss forum

"After looking over my data for the past 9 months,
I conclude that I need to be eating about 1200 calories a day
and exercising the equivalent of 200 calories a day.
Otherwise, I am going to stay right where I am.

Now, can accomplish this behavior???
I am not sure.
I know I don't like being stuck where I am.

So, it is my choice.

I realize that due to injuries my daily movement
has been curtailed and conserved.
My "need" for food stays the same, however."

This is an excellent statement about the problem that many of us have in common,
especially older "reduced obese" women.  After carefully recording our food-intake
and weight data in computer software journals, our data reveals a rather unpleasant truth. 

The calorie needs of our older bodies is far, far less than our appetites;
many of our aging bodies simply will not tolerate heavy exercise;
and our true calorie need is a number far, far lower
than what the "expert" charts indicate is correct for us.

We have to ask ourselves:
"Are we willing to trade the food to be a "normal" size?"
and
"Can we get ourselves to eat in that manner?"

There's a lot currently written about what our bodies required in Paleolithic times,
and I've been thinking about elderly women in that time.
First...there weren't very many post-menopausal women around...
and I imagine that those who did survive to become old, 
had to "earn their keep". 

Since the women were past childbearing years;
the ability to do a lot of physically hard work reduces with age;
and age doesn't necessarily come with increased wisdom,
it would be reasonable to assume that they had less value for their "tribe"
so probably it would have been an important asset 
to have a body that required less food to survive.

What does this mean currently?
I don't know, but I find it interesting to consider.

                   
I frequently visit and participate in various online weight-loss forums.
This morning I posted the following message in one such forum and am choosing to post it here as well.

Posted by a member of a weight-loss forum:

"My questions for you are as follows:

During your weight loss phase did you commit to it
and never look back or were you slipping up here and there?

As a maintainer, do you find that the internal struggle over food
is the same as it was when you were heavy
(I am referring to the guilt of overeating and at times, feeling out of control)?

I have never even been within 30 lbs of goal so I really don't know what it is like.
I slip up a little now and I was not sure if this eventually gets better, worse,
or stays the same."

I've never been perfect, not in my weight-loss phase nor here in my maintenance phase, and slip-ups-here-and-there have always been part of my process.

As a maintainer, the internal struggle over food is about the same.  One part of me wants to eateverything I want, whenever I want to, and the other part of me wants to maintain my weight-loss. These are strong desires that continue to oppose each other.

  However,  when I overeat, I am always conscious of the fact that it is a CHOICE,
and now, when I have out-of-control feelings, it is NOT that I actually have no control or choice about overeating behavior

......despite the intensity of the desires or the difficulty of the struggle, I know that what I put in my mouth is my own choice..... Whether I overeat, eat compulsively, or binge.. I'm choosing my behavior.

I still have out-of-control feelings frequently,  but these are primarily due to the failure of my body to give me positive weight results even after I've chosen to engage in positive eating behavior.

 Bottom Line.... for me... The process and the feelings are forever.
Time doesn't improve them. The only effective response is ACCEPTANCE, of the feelings and of the struggle. ....understanding that it is a part of my life,  and there is no escape possible.

Being fat is hard;
Losing weight is hard;
Maintaining weight is hard;
Choose your hard.