I frequently visit and participate in various online weight-loss forums.
This morning I posted the following message in one such forum and am choosing to post it here as well.

Posted by a member of a weight-loss forum:

"My questions for you are as follows:

During your weight loss phase did you commit to it
and never look back or were you slipping up here and there?

As a maintainer, do you find that the internal struggle over food
is the same as it was when you were heavy
(I am referring to the guilt of overeating and at times, feeling out of control)?

I have never even been within 30 lbs of goal so I really don't know what it is like.
I slip up a little now and I was not sure if this eventually gets better, worse,
or stays the same."

I've never been perfect, not in my weight-loss phase nor here in my maintenance phase, and slip-ups-here-and-there have always been part of my process.

As a maintainer, the internal struggle over food is about the same.  One part of me wants to eateverything I want, whenever I want to, and the other part of me wants to maintain my weight-loss. These are strong desires that continue to oppose each other.

  However,  when I overeat, I am always conscious of the fact that it is a CHOICE,
and now, when I have out-of-control feelings, it is NOT that I actually have no control or choice about overeating behavior

......despite the intensity of the desires or the difficulty of the struggle, I know that what I put in my mouth is my own choice..... Whether I overeat, eat compulsively, or binge.. I'm choosing my behavior.

I still have out-of-control feelings frequently,  but these are primarily due to the failure of my body to give me positive weight results even after I've chosen to engage in positive eating behavior.

 Bottom Line.... for me... The process and the feelings are forever.
Time doesn't improve them. The only effective response is ACCEPTANCE, of the feelings and of the struggle. ....understanding that it is a part of my life,  and there is no escape possible.

Being fat is hard;
Losing weight is hard;
Maintaining weight is hard;
Choose your hard.

It's Monday morning, mid-July, and I'm finding it hard to Find inspiration for myself, let alone Provide any inspiration for others.

The day-to-day sharing that maintaining this website requires is sometimes Challenging for me. My personal focus is continued, consistent weight-maintenance efforts, together with working to achieve a positive outlook on all aspects of my life. This takes ongoing physical and mental effort, and, although it might appear to be an easy task, it is not.

 I experience the same moods as you, and sometimes the "Monday blues" are difficult. Despite continued effort at positive thinking, positive consistent behavior, and patient waiting, my body is not dropping the 5 lbs or so that have crept on during the past few years and sometimes I feel angry and discouraged about that situation.

I remind myself how far I've come, and how maintaining a 150 lb loss is great, despite that 5 lb creep, and although I'm grateful...I'm still P***ed Off. But, I'm not going to drive my car over a cliff just because it has a scratch on it, and I'm not going to give myself permission to overeat,  simply because...no matter what or how much I eat and/or exercise... the "minus 3500 calories = 1 fat pound lost rule"  no longer seems to be applicable to my body.

So this morning...like every morning...I recorded my weight in my diet software. I'm writing this article, and then I'm going to have one of my normal low-cal breakfasts, which I will record in that diet software.  I will then go about the remainder of my daily tasks, and will continue to work to keep my food-intake calories down,and record every bite I take. This is a habit I've established, and a great deal of the time I find it enjoyable.

 For a variety of reasons, I feel a bit down this morning, so....what to do?..... First, I allow myself to feel it, avoiding frantic attempts at escape. Next, I go about my daily tasks, and just do the next indicated thing.

Feelings are like the tide. They go in and out, come and go,  Both the "good" and the "bad". All feelings are part of us, and none of us escapes them. We just have to ride them out while we struggle to stay afloat.

The chances are good that in a short time I'll feel better, and before the day is over, there will be at least a few times when I'll feel really good.

 Life has given me another day with an assortment of possibilities, and I get to choose personal behaviors that will tend to lead me toward positive results.

 It's natural to evaluate our activities in life.  But when that capacity for self-evaluation turns harsh and we begin to label ourselves with generalizations such as, "I'm stupid," "I'm a failure," I'm fat and ugly," that's judging yourself, and

"When you judge yourself, you break your own heart."

I work to defuse negative judgments and avoid putting myself in a mental box.

To avoid this mind litter, I say to myself:

"That's not me."

The harsh voice itself isn't really me. That voice is just an echo of past insults,
maybe from a parent, a sibling, etc. that I wound up mentally adopting. Just a bunch of mental toxic refuse
that has nothing to do with the true essence of who I am.

What the voice is saying also isn't accurate. We can't sum up one person, especially ourselves, with a single word or label. People are much more complex than a harsh judgment, or even for those reverse generalizations such as,
"I'm great." "I'm the best." "I'm better than..." Those can give needless pressure to live up to them,
disappointment when we fail to do so, or arrogance when we do.

We can get out of the mental box by refusing to label ourselves, and refusing to adopt labels others try to apply to us. We can just do what we need and want to do with our attention in the present moment. Then, see how it goes, evaluate what we did, and move on.  It will lighten your load. 

But if "That's not me," then who are you?
What is the true essence of a person?

I believe that If my mind is clear and positive, I tap into the power of something vast and awe-inspiring, something far more powerful and capable than I can otherwise consider. My capabilities and sense of well being grow.

But if my mind is full of static and commotion, caused by negative self-talk, I’m out of the frequency of that power, which makes me more likely to experience misery, negative emotions  and a view of myself as small and limited.

                                    
Due to the information contained in Gary Taubes’
'Why We Get Fat And What To Do About It',
in January I began a low-carb eating experiment-of one.

I followed that plan through January, then went back to normal eating during a vacation week early in February.  Immediately after that vacation, I began low-carb eating again.On 3/20/11, Sunday,  I completed another 6 consecutive weeks.I'm calling my Plan VLC-2011 (for very-low-carb, year 2011).

My plan is to do my best to maintain the same eating Habits that I've previously established, including tracking all my food in my DietPower food journal, while working toward keeping my net carbs at, or less than, 30 per day, and my daily calorie average similar to my past year's amount.

This is not a plan I can recommend to anyone.  I don't even know how it will work in my own body.
I'd like to do this experiment for a 6 month period, but if my weight climbs...or there are other unforeseen side-effects, I will terminate it early.

Years ago, my DietPower journal became an enjoyable Habit for me, and it easily tracks my carbs, fats, proteins and calories etc. I also log in my daily scale weight and DietPower graphs it for me, which enables me see whether my weight is trending up or down over time.

So....
Thus far, I am still enjoying the novelty of eating this low-carb way. I'm not following a specific low-carb plan. like Atkins or Protein Power etc., I'm just working to restrict my carbohydrate intake, and trying to keep my protein and fat intake around the same number of grams.This results in my fat Ratio percentage being about twice my protein Ratio percentage, because protein is 4 calories a gram and fat is 9 calories a gram.

Allegedly, my minimum protein requirement is between 20 grams (WHO) and 36 grams (US RDA).  I usually take in between 50 and 100 grams.

I am aware of the Atkins "carb ladder", which puts foods in about 10 categories, but I am choosing not to follow it, rung by rung etc. The current Theory is that each of our bodies is different in the way it tolerates carbs, and that some people need more restrictions than others. I found it Interesting that Sugar and Refined Grains are NOT on the ladder at all... meaning they are off-limits to everyone, always.
Makes sense to me.

I have been avoiding sugar and refined starch, and I have also been mostly successful at avoiding complex carbs
including whole grains, dry cooked beans, and starchy veggies like corn, potatoes etc,  because these have a really high carb count....  AND I've found that eating a small amount of them causes me to crave much more of them, plus it seems to start up a craving in me for foods with sugar and refined starch as well.

I found that after the first week, my cravings for sugar and starchy foods were greatly reduced. Although they still exist, they are not as severe. Right now, they are sort of an occasional thought..."um, that would taste good"...
instead of an incessant yammer..."GET ME THAT". I still want the carby substance, but mostly I don't feel like I HAVE to have it. which is a change.

 My morning weight is mostly staying inside the 115 - 116 lb range. This is good.
It is also somewhat different, because on a "normal-balanced" diet, my morning weight bounces around a great deal from day to day, and my norm is to easily bounce within a 5 to 8 lb range during any one month.

I have many different measures of Success in this Low-Carb Experiment.  However, Failure would be an upward weight-trend,
and/or Hunger and Cravings greater than I experience while eating a "normal-balanced" diet.

So....in that I am not currently experiencing Failure...thus far, it is a Success.
My quote for today is:

"A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new."
.........................              Albert Einstein

While it is true that many people get tired of calorie counting, and many people don't manage to continue calorie counting under stress, this is not ALWAYS the case.

For example, in my own case, for the past six and a half years I have continued to consistently log ALL of my food into my computer software food log, DietPower, EVERY SINGLE DAY, and this program counts the calories and other nutritional values of that food. That computer program says that today is the 2364th day without any missing data.

This does NOT mean that I never overate or never binged during the past six years, It merely means that I ALWAYS entered ALL of my food into the journal. It became, and is, a HABIT.

This is the principle of ACCOUNTABILITY.
I am accountable for every bite I eat.... even on vacation days, sick days, stress days.
NO MATTER HOW HIGH MY FOOD-INTAKE, I LOG IT.
This has provided me with long-term success.

My life has not been stress-free during this process. I have all of the ongoing NORMAL stresses of life, both good and bad, and I have also had some EXCEPTIONAL stressing circumstances. I'm going to list some of them below, not to show myself as a "victim", but as an example of the stress one can go through while successfully counting calories.

  For Example:

I have two unmarried adult children. During my weight-loss phase, my son was severely burned in a fire, and spent over a month in a hospital burn unit in severe pain, receiving skin graphs.

During my maintenance-phase, my daughter was in the hospital in a coma, and upon physical recovery spent long periods in mental health facilities, which resulted in long-term disability SSI, making her mother (me) the one responsible for handling her ongoing income.

During my weight-loss phase, I was responsible for my aging mother, who had Alzheimer's, and was the one who had to place her in a facility, visit her daily, advocate for her, and witness her death.

During my maintenance phase, my father-in-law died; we were forced to place my disabled mother-in-law into a nursing home, where she was visited frequently until her death, about 6 months ago.

During my maintenance phase, the nephew with whom I had a close relationship, became a Marine, and spent a tour in Iraq, and after coming home safely, spent another tour in Afghanistan, which resulted in his receiving two purple hearts.

During the past 5 years of my maintenance phase, my husband has had eye surgery twice, as well as another unrelated surgery. My best friend for the past 25 years, was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and I spent time with her almost every day until she died 5 months later.Other beloved family members have also dealt with severe illness.

During my maintenance phase, three years ago, I developed a life-threatening medical condition, which resulted in emergency surgery and hospitalization for 10 days. During this time I lived on IV's, and was unable to log my food, but as soon as I was released from the hospital and returned home, I logged in estimates of the amounts of all the liquid food I received, during that past 10 days, and continued with my ongoing food entries.

During the past 6 years, I have also had numerous vacations, holidays, and celebrations...all involving food. I overate during many of those occasions,but NO MATTER HOW MUCH I ATE, I LOGGED IT ALL.

And So Life Goes.
During that time, I also brushed my teeth, combed my hair, got dressed daily, and used the toilet when necessary. I prioritize entering my food into my computer journal as equal to, or more important than, those activities.

I know for a fact that one CAN develop a HABIT of counting calories; and I know for a fact that one CAN continue counting calories under stress; and the truth is, IT ISN'T ALL THAT DIFFICULT.
Except to my family and friends, I'm not all that Special, and I think that there is a very good chance that this is something ANYONE can do, IF THEY DECIDE TO.