Perfectionism - POSTED ON: Jul 22, 2012
Perfectionists are those people who strain compulsively and unceasingly toward unobtainable goals. Pressuring oneself to achieve such unrealistic goals inevitably sets the individual up for disappointment. Perfectionists tend to be harsh critics of themselves when they do not meet the standards they set for themselves. Negative thinking surrounds perfectionism, in particular the "all-or-nothing" thinking in which a person believes that an achievement is either perfect or useless.
Perfectionism is:
* an all pervasive attitude that whatever you attempt in life must be done letter perfect with no deviation, mistakes, slip-ups or inconsistencies
* the irrational belief that you and/or your environment must be perfect
* a rigid, moralistic outlook that does not allow for humanism or imperfection * the striving to be the best, to reach the ideal and to never make a mistake * a habit developed from youth that keeps you constantly alert to the imperfections, failings, and weakness in yourself and others * a level of consciousness that keeps you ever vigilant to any deviations from the norm, the guidelines or the way things are "supposed to be" * the underlying motive present in the fear of failure and fear of rejection, i.e., if I am not perfect I will fail and/or I will be rejected by others * a reason why you may be fearful of success, i.e., if I achieve my goal, will I be able to continue, maintain that level of achievement * an inhibiting factor that keeps you from making a commitment to change habitual, unproductive behavior out of fear of not making the change "good enough" * the belief that no matter what you attempt it is never "good enough" to meet your own or others' expectations
Irrational beliefs that contribute to perfectionism:
* Everything in life must be done to your level of perfection, which is often higher than anyone else's. * It is unacceptable to make a mistake.
* If I have a failure or experience a set back in my efforts to change then I should give up.
* You must always reach the ideal no matter what.
* The ideal is what is real; unless I reach the ideal I am a failure. * You are a loser if you cannot be perfect. * It is what you achieve rather than who you are that is important. * I have no value in life unless I am successful. * There is no sense in trying to do something unless I can do it perfectly, e.g., "I don't attempt things I can't do well." * There are so many roadblocks and pitfalls to keep me from succeeding. It is better just to give up and forget my goal. * Unless I am "Number One," there is no sense in trying. Everyone knows what "Number Two" is. To win is the only acceptable goal. * If you screw up in your efforts to achieve a goal, just give up. It must be too hard to achieve. * You must always strive to reach the ideal in everything you do because it is in the achievement of the ideal that you give meaning to your life. * Don't ever let anyone know what goal you're working on. That way they won't consider you a failure if you don't reach it. * If you can't do it right the first time, why try to do it at all? * There is only one way to reach a goal: the right way. * It takes too much effort and energy to reach a goal. I save myself the aggravation and discouragement by not setting goals for myself. * I'll never be able to change and grow the way I want to, so why try? * I am a human being prone to error, frailty and imperfections; therefore, I won't be able to accomplish things in a perfect or ideal way. I'll just give up on achieving any of my goals or desires.
Rational behaviors needed to overcome perfectionism:
* accept self as a human being * forgive self for mistakes or failings * put self back on the wagon immediately after falling off * accept that the ideal is only a guideline or goal to be worked toward, not to be achieved 100 percent * set realistic and flexible time frames for the achievement of a goal * develop a sense of patience and to reduce the need to "get it done yesterday" * be easier on oneself; setting unrealistic or unreasonable goals or deadlines sets you up for failure * recognize that the human condition is one of failings, weakness, deviations, imperfections and mistakes; it is acceptable to be human * recognize that one's backsliding does not mean the end of the world; it is OK to pick oneself up and start all over again * develop an ability to use "thought stopping" techniques whenever you find yourself mentally scolding yourself for not being "good enough" * visualize reality as it will be for a human rather than for a super human * learn to accept yourself the way you are; let go of the ideas of how you should be * enjoy success and achievement with a healthy self-pride, and eliminate the need for self-deprecation or false humility * learn to enjoy success without the need to second guess your ability to sustain the achievement * reward yourself for your progress, to reinforce your efforts to change even when progress is slight or doesn't meet up to your idealistic expectations * love yourself; to believe that you deserve good things * to eliminate unrealistic expectations and the idea that you are infallible * visualize yourself as "winning" even when it takes more energy, and more perseverance, than what you had planned * let go of rigid, moralistic judgments of your performance and to develop an open, compassionate understanding for the hard times, obstacles and temptations * be flexible in setting goals and be willing to reassess your plan from time to time to keep things realistic * be open to the idea that you will be successful in your efforts to change, even if you are not "first," "the best," "the model," "the star pupil," "the exemplar" or "the finest" * realize that the important thing is to be going in a positive direction
Steps to Overcome Perfectionism
Step 1: Identify your perfectionism.
Step 2: Identify a problematic behavioral pattern you want to change; then list the characteristic negative behavior traits of the pattern. For each of the negative characteristics list positive alternative behavior traits. For each of the new alternative behavior list your likelihood of achieving them 100 percent of the time. How many new behavior traits could you achieve 100 percent of the time?
Step 3: Once you have recognized that no change can be achieved 100 percent of the time, continue changing your problematic behavior patterns. If you continue to be hindered by perfectionism, return to Step 1 and begin again.
The Point of DietHobby? - POSTED ON: Jul 11, 2012
DietHobby exists because I've found being online helpful in my success with weight-loss and maintenance …. and this has become part of my Dieting Hobby. I enjoy visiting, and sometimes participating at, other websites and in various diet forums, and over the past seven years, I've developed some online relationships that I value highly. A problem I've discovered during my years of such participation on other websites happens when someone asks a question or makes a comment, or a discussion occurs about topics that are of ongoing importance to me. I'll spend a very long time researching and preparing an answer or a comment on such issues, but the nature of online websites and forums is for new data to replace old data, and so a few months later, when I'd like to refer to my previous answer or discussion, to help someone else with a similar issue, my answer is buried and difficult or impossible for me to find. Also, other websites are not under my control, and those websites can change their formats and/or delete or edit posts. After a few years of online participation, I began creating word files, and saving my own posts, along with helpful posts of others, but this was rather a cumbersome task, and saving posts in no particular order still made them difficult to find when I wanted to refer to them.
DietHobby was my solution to that problem. It contains place for me to put my thoughts on issues related to dieting and maintenance in an organized, searchable way which is helpful for me, and also for others. My past articles can be found in a list within the top ARCHIVES heading, or individually by previous months in the right-side-page-Blog Archives. My recipes and inspirational videos are categorized and readily available for review by me or by others. My personal history is a part of RESOURCES in the About ME section.
Some of my articles and videos are specific and some rather general, but most of them are timeless… and old entries are as relevant now as they were when I first made them. They are a reflection of me and my values. Who I am and what I think. I hope that this collection will be helpful to others, but I KNOW that it is helpful to me…. and that's really the point, isn't it?
Past Portion Control - POSTED ON: Jun 05, 2012
One of the things I talk most about is Portion Control, which is something that we must do for ourselves. The picture posted above demonstrates one of the reasons why we can't rely on others to do this for us. When we see one of something, one hamburger, one bagel, one small bag of chips, or even one plate of food, it is natural for us to believe that this is one serving. But in fact, even one banana is considered to be two servings. My previous article, Portion Control, gives a rather thorough explanation about this.
Encouragement & Support - POSTED ON: May 17, 2012
DietHobby is a place of encouragement and support. I need encouragement and support as I make my way through Life's path. This is why DietHobby exists. I share many of my thoughts and feelings here, in writing and in videos. My daily eating choices, and my behavior with food … is an ongoing part of my life. It is a thread that weaves its way throughout my life, and I look at dieting as one of my ongoing hobbies .. which is simply a part of my total Lifestyle. My way of thinking is connected to my way of eating. I am the one who chooses what I think about. I am the one who decides where to put my focus. I am the one who has the power to direct my mind toward the positive. DietHobby is a way to help me do that. Part of helping myself is to share my thoughts with you. Perhaps you will find some of these writings and videos encouraging and supportive to you as you travel, in your own individual way, down the path that Life has put before you. The way that I choose to eat, doesn't have to be the way you choose to eat. What works for me may be different than what works for you. But, perhaps you will find it helpful to take in my information, and shift it through your mind, accepting some things, rejecting other things. Blending some of the things you read and hear at DietHobby together with your own valuable truths might be exactly what you need to move you toward your own individual Life goals. DietHobby already has a great deal of content. You can find many things here in this website. … and as I live through the days and weeks, I continue to think, so More will be coming. Look around, get it know DietHobby, see if it is something that will fit into your support structure. Take what you like, and leave the rest.
Weight-Loss in a Nutshell - POSTED ON: May 04, 2012
Our bodies are not Bank Accounts. Although using financial metaphors often helps describe the dieting process, we don't get immediate feedback for calories eaten or not eaten, except from the immediate and temporary water-waste-gain-or-loss equation which is due to an excessive change in our salt intake, or our food volume. Each of our bodies assimilates what we eat, whether it is food or a food-like substance. It uses or stores what it can, and discards, or tries to discard, what it can't. This is a process, and it takes time. The process is complicated, involving enzymes and hormones, some of which haven't even yet been discovered. Although the process is similar for all humans, there are genetic differences between people, and this affects the way that individual bodies function. That said, here is weight loss in a nutshell:
Eat less.
Find a calorie range for you that you can eat daily that
1.) Does not make you want to die, and
2.) Allows for a reasonable energy deficit (meaning, you will consume moderately less than you are burning just by living and exercising).
You can start by finding out how much an "average" body like yours burns in its normal everyday state without effort. Just google: BMR and punch in your stats to get this number. HOWEVER, this number is ONLY an estimate, and due to your own personal genetic equation, your body could easily burn far less. Work to eat 250 calories less than that number per day. Eating 250 calories less than your body burns every day will lead to a one-half pound per week weight loss (meaning stored fat loss)… but for most people…the scale will not reflect this loss accurately on a day-to-day basis.. and sometimes..not even on a week-to-week basis. Move more.
Which essentially means: move more. By move I mean move, in any way your body likes. And by more, I mean more, as in - more than you currently do.
If you try to burn an additional 250 calories through exercise each day, you could lose an additional one-half pound weekly. HOWEVER, extra exercise makes the body more hungry and more tired. So if you eat a little extra because you exercised, or you spend more time resting during the rest of the day because you exercised, then exercise will be ineffective for weight-loss which is due to a release of stored fat. Theoretically, a 500 calorie deficit will lead to 1 pound of weight loss from fat storage over a one week period. This is based on the general rule used by science: 1 lb = 3500 calories, so 7 days of burning 500 calories less than your calorie intake creates 1 lb of stored fat loss. But CAUTION. This is a "general" rule, and the calculation is far more complicated than it appears. Even when we weigh and measure our food, and track it in a computer program, it is impossible to calculate with precision the exact amount of calories our individual body eats, and even far less possible to precisely calculate the exact amount of calories that our individual body burns in exercise.. even when using computer exercise trackers such as a "Body Bug" etc. Tracking food and exercise is valuable, but that information will never be precise, or totally accurate.
Mar 01, 2021 DietHobby: A Digital Scrapbook. 2000+ Blogs and 500+ Videos in DietHobby reflect my personal experience in weight-loss and maintenance. One-size-doesn't-fit-all, and I address many ways-of-eating whenever they become interesting or applicable to me.
Jun 01, 2020 DietHobby is my Personal Blog Website. DietHobby sells nothing; posts no advertisements; accepts no contributions. It does not recommend or endorse any specific diets, ways-of-eating, lifestyles, supplements, foods, products, activities, or memberships.
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