Hope.
Each of us knows what it feels like.
Each of us wants to feel it.
But exactly what is it? How do we get it?

Hope is the emotional state
which promotes the belief in a positive outcome
related to events and circumstances in one's life.

It is the feeling that what we want can be had;
or that events will turn out for the best;
or that something desired may happen.

Hope comes into play when things are not going well
or at there’s considerable uncertainty about how things will turn out.
Hope opens us up, removes the blinders of fear and despair
and allows us to see the big picture,
which allows us to become creative and have belief in a better future.

 Hope is cultivated when we have a goal in mind,
determination that a goal can be reached,
and a plan on how to reach those goals.
Hopeful people are like the little engine that could,
because they keep telling themselves "I think I can, I think I can".

Hope is distinct from positive thinking,
which refers to reversing pessimism,
and the term "false hope" refers to a hope
based entirely around a fantasy or an extremely unlikely outcome.

That said...and as unlikely as it might seem...
I usually feel hopeful.

For those who are following my “Ask Grandma” videos
click to see my latest one: “You Are Stronger Than You Think”
which is located in DietHobby under RESOURCES, Videos, Ask Grandma.

Sometimes the emotion I feel is “frustration”,
and this includes a bit of anger
when I’ve been working hard toward my goals
but it just isn’t working.

All of us have times when we seem to be stuck,
and no matter how hard we try,
we don’t seem be be able to get anywhere.
Just spinning our wheels in the mud
can cause us to feel pure frustration.

Even though it feels like nothing is working,
when I look closely,  
I usually find at least something is going right.
This takes me out of the negative mindset of “it’s hopeless”
and gets me back to focusing on the positive.

Sometimes we can get so wrapped up in a problem
and in trying to solve it that we forget
what we were originally trying to accomplish.
This is true for me regarding my current seeming inability to lose more weight,
after all, my goal is maintenance of my large weight-loss,
and I’m doing quite well at that.

 We always have options.

When we are really frustrated with a problem,
we tend not to want to work on it anymore.
It’s hard, it’s frustrating, and we’re not getting anywhere.
So we would rather just avoid it.
But, like Thomas Edison said,
“Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize
how close they were to success when they gave up.”

When we get stuck on focusing on what we don’t want to happen,
or afraid of the absolute worst thing that could happen,
it’s good to copy those atheletes who imagine themselves
competing flawlessly over and over again.
We can choose to see ourselves achieving what we want.
Visualize it and really feel it to inspire ourselves to keep moving forwards.

 Often things aren’t as bad as they look at first.
Sometimes they seem much worse just because we’re tired or mentally drained.
Taking a break and remembering to keep a sense of humor can help.
The time of frustration will pass, and a positive mind
is far more open to solutions and answers than a negative one
that keeps thinking that it’s “hopeless” and “what’s the use?”
A closed mind won’t be able to see the possible solutions
when they do come along, so it’s important to stay positive.

With weight problems, just like with all other problems,
the solution is to figure out what your options are;
decide on a plan; focus; and then take action.

  Will my body lose back down to my lowest point in maintenance?
I don’t know, but I do know that while trying to do that,
I’ve not gained additional weight,
and that is a total plus.

I like the following quote:

“What good is any feeling we may have about ourselves,
if it only lasts as long as others agree to it?

Seeking and receiving approval from others
is like sitting down hungry to an imaginary meal.
You’re invited to eat all you want,
but no matter how much imaginary food is served,
you can never get your fill. Your hunger remains.

No fictional feast ever satisfies.
But we still look to others for our sense of self even though
the very moment it’s received, it must be renewed.

No one can give us that which can only be found with our Self.
No one can give us the approval we seek,
because it isn’t his or hers to give.

And the more we understand the truth of this higher fact,
the less inclined we’ll be to give ourselves away.
We must do the needed inner work,
which alone leads to owning our own lives.”

by Guy Finley at www belifnet.com

The definition of Discipline involves how someone
is trained by others to do what is expected of them.

Self-discipline involves training oneself for improvement.

Most people don’t have a discipline problem;
most people have a self-discipline problem.

One of the most critical components of reaching one’s goals
is to be able to manage time, thought, and physical action
on a daily basis. The ability to do this depends on
how well a person puts self-discipline into practice.

People responding to discipline do what is expected
because of an outside authority or society’s dictates.

Self-discipline is the power that comes
from doing what is right by one’s own choice
instead of being under the threat of discipline from another.

It takes self-discipline to consistently perform actions
that require sacrifice and work.

People with self-discipline
deliver what is expected of them, and beyond,
even when no one is looking.

Try to comprehend a person
who picks up a piece of litter from the street
because they see it,
not because they are told to do so,
or to impress others.

 Now, apply this concept to Dieting.

Discipline is an outside Expert or Diet Guru
taking control of our food choices, and
determining specifically how-what-when we must eat-or-not-eat
in order to lose weight or maintain weight-loss.

Self-discipline involves consistently following through
in making the kind of day-to-day individual personal food choices
which will result in weight-loss and maintenance of that weight-loss.

Even.....

…..when no one is looking
…..when we don’t feel like it,
…..when the scale doesn’t show our desired results,

                           
Sometimes the things we want are mutually-exclusive.
Here is a common statement made by dieters:

“I am excited about dropping my extra fat,
and I want to stop dieting and obsessing over every bite.
I think about food and weight loss all the time.
I want to just be free of that and eat normally.”

The….draw….of many diets is the desire for two distinctly separate things,

* to lose and maintain weight.
* to be able to eat “normally” without having to think about it.

 These are two separate goals,
and for almost every obese or reduced obese person,
these goals are Mutually-Exclusive.
Meaning that if you have the one, you can’t have the other.
You can’t have them both at the same time.

These conflicting desires are exploited by modern marketing
which promises us that we can have both of these things together,
but it’s a false promise,
an insidious lie that raises unreasonable expectations
and tends to doom us to failure.

Many people spend their lives
trying to force that square peg into a round hole,
refusing to ACCEPT that universal truth.

In our current modern society, difficult day-to-day food choices
which require thought and self-discipline,
will always be an ongoing part of one’s way-of-life
in order for an obese person to become normal weight,
and for a reduced obese person to remain normal weight.
 We will never be able to automatically eat like a "normal" person.

While we can develop positive habits that will help us in that task.
Developing habits takes a great deal of effort,
and although, after these habits are established, 
certain habits might help reduce a few of our conscious food choices,
it won't resolve the problem.
Specific eating Habits might make some eating choices easier,
but it won't eliminate the continual thinking and choosing process.

That dieting Truth doesn’t have to be a negative.
Make it a positive. 
 Dieting can become an enjoyable Hobby.

For those interested in following my Diet Recipe videos,
I recently posted a new one: "Crispy White Pizza",
which is located here at DietHobby under Recipes, Mini-Meals.