Recently I've been thinking about the concepts of Personal Worth,
and or feelings of Worthlessness as they apply to me and to my own
endeavors with food, weight-loss, and maintenance of weight-loss.

I'm rather fond of the psychological concepts of Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT),
and also of Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy (REBT).

One of the concepts of REBT, is that
...if intrinsic value exists at all...
we get it because we CHOOSE, we DECIDE to have it. 
It exists because of our own definition.
We are "good" or "deserving" because we THINK we are,
and not because anyone awards us this kind of "inherent value". 

When persons can call themselves "worthwhile" just because they decide to do so,
they will tend to lose their desparate need for the approval of others. 
If we reduce our need for the esteem of others, 
we will find it easier to stop rating ourselves as persons,
and will come to value ourselves simply because we are alive. 

A philosophy of "worth" and "worthlessness" leads to disturbed feelings
of guilt, shame, and self-loathing, and we'll be better off with the concept
that we are not "worthwhile" because of our effectiveness,
or "worthless" because of our ineffectiveness. We merely EXIST. 

Self-acceptance means fully accepting oneself,
one's existence, and one's right to live and to be as happy as one can be,
--- no matter WHAT traits one has, or what acts one does. 

Self-acceptance doesn't mean self-esteem, self-confidence, self-respect,
or self-regard, because all of these terms imply that one accepts onself
BECAUSE one does something well, or BECAUSE other people like one. 
Unconditional self-acceptance means that you accept yourself
because you are alive and have DECIDED to accept yourself. 

Unconditional self-acceptance makes several minimal assumptions 
about people's intrinsic worth or value. These are:

• You exist
  
  
• By continuing to exist, you can probably achieve more pleasure than pain,
  thus making it desirable for you to keep living.
  
  
• You can help reduce your pain and increase your pleasure.

• You decide that you will try to live and make your life as pleasurable 
  and as unpainful as you can make it...  You can choose to strive for achievement
  and approval, but not to prove your greatness as a person, but only because
  you PREFER to achieve and to be loved. 

For those interested in learning more about these concepts, 
I recommend reading "A Guide To Rational Living" (1997) &"
"The Art & Science of Rational Eating" (1992) by Albert Ellis, PH.D.

                               
Sometimes I find that I learn as much
from a "Bad Example" as I do from a good one.

One of the things I do here in my Dieting Hobby
is follow the online sharing of various people
who are engaged in the pursuit of weight-loss,
as they try this diet or that one, or follow no structured plan.

Watching others teaches me things,
and reinforces things that I've already learned
from my own experience.

For several years I've been following the journal
of someone who shares her daily thoughts and activities
as it relates to her weight-loss attempts.
She is the same high weight now,
as she was when she began the online journal.

She appears to be incapable of grasping and holding on
to any type of dieting plan .. even for a one month period.
As soon as she has a failure, she rethinks everything
and starts a different plan.

The thing that becomes apparent to anyone following her
for any length of time, is that every single one of these plans
is the same … in that … she doesn't want to deny herself anything.

She wants to eat what she wants, in the amounts that she wants,
whenever she wants to eat it.

Despite all of her experience, and a multitude of evidence to the contrary,
she desperately holds on to the unfounded belief
that she doesn't need to sacrifice anything she wants.
That her obese body is going to begin acting like a "normal" body
and tell her how to eat to become smaller. ..
And, of course... it doesn't.

I have personally observed that her body hasn't done this
for at least the past several years,
despite hundreds of good intentions and well-thought out plans,
even though she has put forth an enormous amount of mental energy,
and given her body many opportunities to do so.

This example of failure … though sad for her ….
is helpful for me.
I, like many others, have that seed of fantasy within me;
that desire to believe those misguided Intuitive Eating Gurus.

I'd like to believe that my body will guide me to normalcy;
that all I have to do is listen carefully to it,
and my own body will tell me what, and when, and how much to eat
in order to leave the state of obesity, and
reach and maintain inside a normal weight range.

The thought is alluring. Such a pleasant one.
But, unfortunately, it is based on little or no truth,
even though it is frequently promoted by (sometimes) well-intentioned people,
who tell outright lies in order to support that baseless Theory…
…which is no more than a hopeful wish.

The "bad" examples of those obese people
who choose to embrace this thinking
are helpful to remind me of the Truth.

I can be normal weight.
I can maintain my body at normal weight.
But, not by following my own instincts, or
by giving my body what it "tells" me it wants.

Weight-loss and Maintenance of Weight-loss
take continual daily effort,
in order to establish habits of "good" eating,
and to consciously make "good" choices
when "bad" eating habits beckon.

CAVEAT:  My writings on this subject refer to people who 
have spent long periods of time well inside the established borders of obesity.
I do not speak for people who have been normal weight for most of their lives,
and/or whose bodies have only been 20 or 30 lbs inside the obesity range.
Those bodies could be different,
and those people might (or might not) have a different experience.

  I'd like to be a person of value.

Here at DietHobby, I've been having a lot of fun with new designs.
Some technical aspects of this website are attracting me today,
and I want to start playing with them.

Still, I need to continue to eat reasonably,
and I want to write something encouraging this morning.
However, I find myself distracted by my current tasks
and am having trouble thinking of anything
motivational or inspirational to share this morning.

Life continues to happen to us all.
Somehow in order to lose weight or maintain weight-loss,
each of us needs to keep our focus
on how, what, and the amount of food that we eat
… throughout and despite ...
life's multitude of events and occasions.

Every day is just one more day in life.

Each of us chooses, every day, where to put our focus,
and chooses whether or not to follow through with what it takes
to sustain the kind of consistent behavior
which is necessary for us to achieve
our most important personal goals.

Each of us has the ability to choose our attitudes.
We can be positive or negative, it's up to us.

When my attitude is positive and upbeat,
it makes my day brighter and more pleasant.

I choose to work toward having a positive attitude.
I will fill my mind with happy, inspiring thoughts,
by reading and watching things that encourage and inspire me.

I will either surround myself with happy, pleasant people,
or choose to spend my time engaged in pleasant activities alone,
and will avoid and ignore negative people who complain and whine,
and choose to wallow in their misery.

A positive attitude will help me succeed with my goals,
and will help me survive the many difficulties
that each of us experiences during our lives.